Uplifter...

So I have been told that the posts have been getting depressing and that you all think I should be put on suicide watch...

Many of you know that I am a acerbic person...
May have called this sourness slightly sarcastic...

They are right...
I am also a bit dramatic and melancholic...

So don't worry...well not too much...
I do have happy moments...

They're just not as fun to write about...

But I'll try...so here goes...

This morning I woke up to a sound that seemed to be coming from the wall just behind my head...my first thought was MOUSE...but then I realized that the sound was outside...so I rolled over and opened my curtain just in time to see a Marten run away with a mouse in his mouth...

My first reaction was right...it was a mouse...but it was a dead mouse...my favorite kind...

Maybe I'll keep that Marten around...the rule book says that I can't have any "non-native" animals living in my cabin...

Last time I checked (which was this morning) Martens were indigenous...

Heeeheee...beat that Lord Byron...

Boredom Loves Misery...

I am so bored and sick of snow that Texas actually sounds pretty good right now...

And I hate the heat...
And republicans...(Except for those in my family who are...I love you guys!)

I also think that my life would be a fantastic, satirical screenplay...

Why?...

I'm over educated...sitting in a box office...which is actually a box of a room with no windows...selling tickets to a play that makes no sense...

Studying for my upcoming ornithology class...I don't get birds...

Plus I'm single...in a town with a guy girl ratio of 7:1...the only men I get to look at are cyber...because I'm stuck in the woods with 12 other girls...

And all the guys in town are fitness fanatics whose ideas of fun are triathlons and trail running...

All of my friends live far away...

The only people outside of school that I talk to on a daily basis are my Mom and Sister...who are great to talk to...but...

I don't even get to have my cat...(Yes, I know what I sound like...)
Maybe I should follow in Lord Bryon's footsteps and get a pet bear...

See, over educated...

And all this so I can study to be a naturalist...even though I don't want to be outside 24/7...

I don't even like butterflies...every naturalist loves butterflies...

I'm losing weight...which would be good if it wasn't because of the flu and lack of anything good to eat...I can't cook because my tiny cabin in the woods has no kitchen......

And...

IT's STILL SNOWING!!!

If that's not a screenplay waiting to happen...I don't know what is...

I've got OSCAR written all over me...

Too bad it's just in Sharpie...

I told you I was bored...

I.M...Finished...

That's it...

I'm done...

With the paper... What did you think I was going to say?

Yes folks after many hours of skilled procrastination...I found within me 18 pages of words...

No I didn't just write "The cat sat on the mat"...although I have been tempted to throw that randomly into a paper just to see if professors actually read the whole thing...

No, I found 18 pages of brilliance...

Now I don't want to toot my own horn....actually I do...It's really that good of a paper...

I managed to say everything I wanted to say in a seemless...dare I say...fluid style that few writers are able to perfect...

I printed it out and handed it in...I'm sure that my instructors will weep at my feet...begging for me to write more...

I can hear them now....

"I.M. Knot, You are brilliant! Why can't I be as smart as you?"

"Well...you are too kind...Yes...I am a genious thank you for noticing...

No you can't kiss my feet..."

Yes...yes...yes...


Brilliant I say...BRILLIANT!


18 pages of writing without saying anything...but making a point of not letting the reader know that they haven't actually been given any information...that's my speciality!

After all I do have a Lit degree...

Should I mention that I finished writing the paper at 3:30 this morning...

I hope I spelled my name right...

Heeheeheeheee....

What?

I'm fine...

Really..................................................................

Struggling...

This may come as quite a shock...but I am struggling with this program...and life in general...at the moment...Most of you know that I love studying...I love it to the point that I would enroll in college just to learn new things..for no other reason than they sound interesting...I am a nerd and embrace it...

So now that "They" have given me an assignment which I would normally love...I have a complete lack of initiative...I have no desire to research...no desire to write...no desire to argue my point of view...

I know! I don't want to write an academic paper that argues my point of view!

Pick your jaws up from the floor...

"WHAT HAS HAPPENED?", you ask...

I don't know...

"Well what do you want to do?"...

I want to check out of school and for the first time in my life do nothing...NOTHING...

I don't want to worry about who I'm going to be when I grow up...I strongly suspect that I am that person already...

I don't want to worry about grades and how my life is being measured by others through hours of argument and paper writing...you know all the stuff I used to love...

I don't want to look around and worry about what people think of me...I suspect they'll think what they want whether or not I look around...

And I really don't want to write because I HAVE to...I want to write because I WANT to...I don't want to write something that will prove to "them" that I am a thinking being...I know I am...

That's all I do is think...

Maybe that's my problem...people who clearly don't think about anything seem relatively happy...look at the Hollywood elite

That's IT!...

I'm going to stop thinking about things that I am not interested in...I don't care...

What do you think?...

Right decision?...

Well it worked for about 10 seconds...

I'll have to try harder next time...