Happy Teasure Hunts to all in 2009!

More Cheer!

Merry Christmas from Billings!

Long time Comin'

So the world has kept revolving and I've kept busy...
Have you ever felt that the world's orbit and your path don't quite mirror each other...

Well welcome to my world...
Or mostly my Statistics class...

What the Hell do I know about statistics?...well the answer is the same now as it was 15 weeks ago...

Not a whole heck of a lot...
Chi square still sounds like a tasty dessert...post hoc is what happens after too much tequila...pseudo experiments are bad first dates...and true experiments are way too complicated and everything you think you need to control turns out to be only a few of the extraneous variables that will screw up your research...which results in things that are not statistically significant but may have a large enough effect size to matter...

Who have I lost?...
Go ahead and re-read it...it won't make a difference...

Trust me...

Other than the little gold nugget of "Question Statistics and never believe things people tell you are certain!"...not too much was retained...

Could have saved the $1,000 bucks and got that out of Bartlett's quotations...

Or in a Box of Cracker Jacks...do they still make Cracker Jacks or have they been abolished due to trans fat or carb numbers?...

So while I was setting up an ANOVA test...which has nothing to do with stars..and correlating data...I figured out another thing to NOT be when I grow up...

A Clown...

They don't make any sense either...and their effect size usually has a negative correlation with normal people...

But I can't say for certain...

Oh and "Catcher in the Rye"...what's all the hype about?...

I Have Found Jesus...

Well, I've found his picture anyway...

Apparently when you get placed by a university to observe area teachers teach...they assign you to the places they believe will fit you the best...

They put me...however...in a Private...Catholic...High School...

I'll pause while those of you who know my history with private schools collect themselves...

Done?...

I am what most people consider a "pot stirrer"...

I've had instances in my life when church hasn't given me good enough answers..."Because I said so"...has never worked well for me...

And as an open-minded, right to choose, type of person...church makes me a little angry at times...

So as I walked in to the school through a doorway with the Virgin Mary above it...seriuosly lovely alabaster statue...I was greeted by Jesus...

About ten Jesuses in fact...all piousley hanging on the walls of the school...

Now, don't get me wrong...I love Jesus...But when He's depeicted in the old, sad baroque style with all their gilded frames and dark colors...I kind of get the impression that the paintings are watching me...

Now I don't mind Jesus watching over me...but watching me from a golden frame at 8 in the morning...is a bit disconcerning...

Now multiply that painting by ten and you might get what I mean...

It's downright creepy...and it doesn't matter who's in the painting...their eyes follow you...

Maybe that's what they're supposed to do to remid you that God is always watching...

But does he have to watch you from a gold frame and look so depressed when he does it...

Why can't the paintings of Jesus be happy to see you...instead of freeking you out?

Especially at 8 in the morning when the last thing you need is some guy disapproving of you before you even get out of the hall...

Where the "F" have I been?

Yes...I know....it has been forever...

For the speedy catch-up version here it is...at any point feel free to post questions about the giant holes I will inevitably leave in the story...

When last you heard I was neck deep in a summer of middle schoolers teaching the skills of outdoorness...I have to say that they were lovely children and I didn't find myself eying cliffs to push them off of...

I did finish the "program" and was very happy to see free wine and beer at the ceremony...I even managed some nostalgic tears along with the "hallelujahs" and "I can't believe it's finally overs"...and of course the hysterical and maniacal laughing I tried to keep contained...not very successfully thanks to the free wine...

Then it was a month of nothing...and I mean nothing...

Which was something I could have gotten used to if it wasn't for my damn conscience always pushing and poking at me...

Note to self...listen to subconscious more...it's not as motivated...

So I packed all my stuff...well not all of it...

And moved back to a larger town/small city to finish my Masters degree...

After a week of classes I find myself inundated with too much stimulation and fear that my mind will melt at any moment...

Real Grad school kinda sucks...

Especially when you have a committee overseeing your every academic move under the guise of "helping" you through the maze and hoop jumping...these three people...all professors or professionals in your field...periodically get together to discuss what you're doing wrong and how these mistakes will cost you months of time and thousands of dollars...like I need three more people telling me that...and you get to sit there and try really hard not to scream and break down in hysterical crying...there's never free wine around when you need it...

Plus you "get to" take fun classes like "Research Design and Interpretation"...yippee...

Basically this class is the bane of my existence...it's all statistics...need I remind you that I have a degree in ENGLISH LITERATURE...

I haven't done real math since 1997...

I'm screwed...double exclamation point!!

And to make my life a little more enjoyable...the professor of this class-from-hell is on my committee...

Can't wait for the next meeting...

But at least it's only one class that's causing mass panic and fetal position rocking...

And I have to remember where I was last year at this time...schlepping a 40 pound pack around while trying to teach 5th graders about science and hoping to God I wouldn't loose one of them in the woods...

So not really a fish out of water anymore...

Just a freshwater fish in a statistical ocean...

Still swimming but slowly realizing that the salt may kill me...if my shark-like committee doesn't get there first...

Gulp...

Here we go again...